Balm and Battles

Do you ever feel a wee bit trapped inside yourself? The body you own is not functioning properly and you’re beginning to wonder if God loving you despite this issue means He just made you broken. He wants me to stay this way, you think. Sorry. Deal with it. You’d make a worse mess by…

Congrats! You get to hold me accountable!

So this summer, my goal is to start writing posts at least once every two weeks! The aim is to work towards posting every week . I like writing, but not enough that it comes easily to me. Rambling, however, certainly does…so welcome to your biweekly ramble!  [We’ll see how long THIS lasts…] Have you no shame?…

Be Broken (spare words)

Mary Magdalene broke her jar of the most essential oils over Jesus’ feet, And the sinful woman at Simon’s broke the alabaster jar, Because she was aware And because she was aware He’d be bruised purple like lavender The Spirit would make us alert and refresh better than peppermint And it would defy the naysayers…

As “little” as I can say

It really is hard for me to write about God, since I begin to feel so insecure about myself when I do. And that is so, so wrong. Because I am experiencing the deepest reaches of Him every single day, and that should never make me insecure. It needs to fill every single inch of…

wonder-filled

How to even begin? I started senior year, and thus, not a lot got pumped out by the writing machine. I never really was much of a writing machine anyway–more of a writing creature. I do, however, need to keep the creature in check or it goes wild. It’s sporadic. It does nothing or everything….

Saudade

Do you ever hear a song that takes you back to a moment? There’s just this polaroid of the moment that comes to mind where you remember listening to the song. Me, at age 15 vs. me, at probably age 2 I see my choir on my first year there, doing hokey hand motions and singing…

Bless This Beach

Sometimes the last thing you want to do is feel joy because the first thing you want to do is make sure it doesn’t disappear. Don’t screw it up, they whisper. And they’re not even real, physical people. They’re in your head. You’re not a schizophrenic, but just a really lost girl. A girl whose…

uphill

The worst thing about being happy, I’ve found, is the terror coming with it. You’d think when you are blessed in a way you’ve prayed so much for, you’d finally find peace. You expect to dance to jazzy ukulele chords, sprinting uphill in the perfectly breezy sunshine, reaching the top and eagerly going home for…

Bittersweet Mystery

(“idk”, a drawing I made on May 11th, 2016) I hugged her as if she was me from a year ago. A year ago, I was crying on the eve of my 16th birthday. A year ago, I’d not only left a place I called home, but I had to let go of a story that…

Dark Clay

Lori Roeleveld is one of my favorite Christian writers because her blog posts always encourage me to not just learn how to make it through a day as a Christian. She reminds me in her words that this world will pass away. She reminds me I’m not strong enough. She reminds me we all are…

Gray Flowers

  There’s this song by the Gray Havens that’s stuck with me since a close friend introduced me to the band a few years back. It’s called “Gray Flowers.” The lyrics tell the story of a colorful town where the one law is that everything must be colorful and nothing is allowed to be drab…

Out

When I moved, I never thought I’d want to go somewhere so much. No, I wasn’t thrilled about leaving the country I’d called home 8 years. It hurt. And it scares me still that the place I’m in (and the place I’m going) I will probably leave at some point as well. Yes, you heard…